Review – The Sims 3

The Sims, over the years, has been called a lot of things. The first thing that springs to mind is 'milked'. The second thing that springs to mind is the target market; as I said on a recent podcast of ours:

As long as there are eleven year old girls there will be The Sims.

Which is sort of the problem: The Sims 3 is a 12+. But anyway. This is meant to be a review, not a rant (or are the two the same...).

I do not condemn EA for this. The games industry is  (supposedly) far too geared towards games made for bloodthirsty Japenese or German teenagers with spots and a worrying fixation with S&M. At least, this is what critics of the industry would lead us to believe. However, recently the demographics of games have improved and expanded, with about 40% of gamers now being women, according to the ESRB, though how they'd know, I do wonder. With the release of games that are not just killing and creating empires, but not girly in a Barbie, patronising way, games developers, and EA and Maxis especially, have realised in the past few years that they can draw in the 50% of the human race they had been neglecting to make games for.  Thus nowadays there are many games that cater for all audiences. Spore is a prime example. Build empires, conquer space, or just create an interestingly coloured creature that converts enemies by playing a musical instrument. And who made Spore? Why, EA and Maxis of course. And what are they famous for, I wonder?

Yes, the ultimate girl game, the Sims. Virtual dolls to do your bidding while you ponder over what fittings to have in your bathroom - french windows, perhaps? And maybe a lime green floor. But it doesn't matter really, does it? Because it's not as if there are any other Sims around to watch yours as they blurredly have a bath. Because your house has always just been in a field, with a road in front. Sure, Sims occasionally stroll past, but it isn't really like the neighbourhood you see in your map, is it? Well, not anymore. Because, as EA have used adverts pretty much everywhere to promote (I even saw one hanging in a pub toilet) YOUR SIMS CAN HAS NEIGHBOURHOOD TO WALK AROUND IN. To prompt girls all over the world to cries of OMG, ZOMG and ZOMFG SO EXCITED, EA has been SHOUTING VERY VERY LOUDLY TO SAY THE SIMS IS TOTALLY AWESOME. Unfortunately, EA cannot really be trusted as they are not really going to run around waving their arms in the air screaming  THE GAME WE HAVE BEEN DEVELOPING FOR THE LAST FIVE YEARS IS ACTUALLY ALMOST EXACTLY THE SAME AS ITS PREDECESSOR JUST WITH A FEW MORE HOUSES THAT SHOULD HAVE BEEN THERE ANYWAY. But enough of the bold capitals - on with the review (man, I ought to structure these - I mean, you don't think I actually do, do you?). [editor's note - no Will, I don't.]

The key change is the aforementioned neighbourhood - NO LOADING TIMES - which is actually a lot better than my scathing previous comments made it out to be. Not only are there the other houses in the neighbourhood, there are also the places of work, shops, community parks and so much more. Actually I am now already starting to have trouble writing this as I am being overcome by an uncontrollable urge to play this game. I love it so much! I REALLY DO! *deep breaths*. Sorry, I had better explain why. I secretly always have loved The Sims, even though I was (and am) always absolutely awful at it. My Sims always end up permanently needing the loo, or food, or sleep or some other thing that inhibits me from achieving their (and my) goals. Luckily, Maxis have revised the system so they don't have their "needs" so often, but even so it is a challenge to fulfill this, and get the kids to do their homework and play and keep them happy and such.  I think the problem is that I always rush things and try and get them to improve really quickly, which is now pointless. Maxis have turned off the ageing system - your Sims still get older, but only when you want them to.

This makes it easier to achieve some of the new skills, which can now also be learnt at various places round the neighbourhood. The Sims now also have a lifetime goal when you create them (more about the Sim creation system in a bit) that it is a good idea to achieve and can bring great rewards. It is usually something like getting to the top of a certain career track, which takes time and...no, just time. Another new feature is a "traits" system, whereby you pick five when you create a Sim (though children start off with 3 and gain one every birthday). These give your Sim special characteristics and abilities - for example, if you choose to give your Sim the genius trait, they will be better at learning the logic skill and advance careers quicker, whereas if you give them the good sense of humor trait, they will be better at interacting with other Sims and have special actions they can do - tell really funny stories and such. Of course, you can pick up to five traits, so mix and match. You can make, for example, an evil, cowardly, hydrophobic, lazy sim, who loves setting fire to things (in a word, Nometet himself). Go nuts - you control these people! *evil laugh*

As Alex said when he did a little mini review thing [Alex - I don't remember this...], the Sim creation system has been even more improved than in The Sims 2 so creating a Sim using every tool at your disposal can take ages. You can now literally change everything - no longer must you stick to the predesigned clothes and hair - just create your own! Fashion designers will love it - and the same ability to add your own colours or patterns to everything extends to stuff in the houses too. You can even make your Sims different colours (Ayla Secura meets an Orion slave girl, anybody?), for some inexplicable reason - oh hang on, I just thought of one, didn't I?

Now, criticisms. There are a few. One, EA have not bothered improving the graphics at all yet you still need a computer with specs over double the Sims 2's to play it. Two, the days are still that weeny bit to short, meaning it is almost impossible to get everything you want to do done and still keep your Sims alive. Three, you seem to be only to create one neighbourhood - I think. Four, switching between families to control is quite difficult. Five, there is no five.

So, is the Sims still a game for girls? Yes. Have they changed anything to make it more gender-friendly? No, not really. But you can still love it in secret. It is awesome.

Nometet.com says:

+ Do I need to put pluses? YOU CAN MAKE TINY PEOPLE DO YOUR CRAZED BIDDING

- Still impossible for me to play as I am hopeless at keeping anything larger than a guinea pig alive

- Days still that little bit too short to fit everything in

EA provided a lot of screens for the Sims 3. I felt obliged to download them all.

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